Geek N’ Bake: Bob’s Burgers Beautiful Beef* Bonanza Bash
Hey I had to get the six Bs in there to celebrate one of my favourite shows returning for a sixth season! Yup last night the premier episode for the sixth season of Bob’s Burgers returned last night and if you’re anything like me you spend as much time drooling over Bob’s wonderful burger creations every week as you do laughing at the family and their mis-adventures.
Well because I am all for the Belcher lovin’ this Geek N’ Bake is dedicated to the top chef and his family but rather desperately trying to master one of Bob’s own masterpieces I felt it best to try and pay homage to the Bob and his beef skills.
*There’s a vegetarian option don’t worry!
The Sixth Season-ing
DIFFICULTY
Normal
TIME
60 minutes
INGREDIENTS
Burger: 375g beef mince, 1tsp seasme oil, 3 tbsp light soy sauce, 3 tbsp dark soy sauce, 2 tsp Chinese 5 Spice, 1 tsp garlic powder, 4 chopped scallions.
Stir-fry: Dried egg noodles, baby corn, mange-touts, sesame seeds
PROCESS
To begin with make sure that your hands and surfaces are pristine. We are going to be working with raw meat and it’s always best to watch your hygiene and where you place utensils and other ingredients while working with the beef. To reduce exposure to the raw meat, make sure to prep everything else first, measure out your spices and chop the scallions, then toss them together. Add a little water to wet your ingredients and let the spice stick to the onions. Set these aside in the fridge.
In a seperate bowl, take the beef and pour the soy sauces and oil over it. Using either a wooden spoon or your hands mix the ingredients together but take your time and try not to overwork the meat.
Take the spices and onion out of the fridge and add to the meat.
Stick the oven on a warm temperature.
Work the onions into the beef while also shaping it into patties and place on a plate. Wrap in clingfilm and allow them at least 30 minutes to sit in the fridge. The combined ingredients should wield three nicely sized burgers but can be rolled thinner if you need to make more or bigger if you like your burgers nice and thick.
Fill a saucepan with water and a frying pan with enough oil to coat the bottom. When the oil is hot add your burgers and let the water come to a boil. Allow the burger to cook for four minutes on one side before you flip them and allow the same time for it to cook on the other.
As the burgers cook on the second side, wash the vegetables and add the dried noodles to the boiling water. Lift the burgers and place into the oven to keep them warm while you prepare the stir fry side.
Toss the veg into the frying pan you used for the burgers and toss quickly with some tongs. When your noodles are cooked strain them but be careful to keep some of the water. When the veg have cooked to your taste, add the noodles are stir quickly, adding the leftover water you set aside, pouring as much as you like, allowing for thick or runnier sauces.
Toast some sesame seed burger buns and add the cooked patties. Dress the burger with some of the noodles, plating the rest as a delicious side. Toss some sesame seeds on your side dish and top your burger off with a little of the sauce for some extra flavour. Looking to spice the burger up a little? No sweat! Instead of ketchup use a sweet chilli sauce or a spicy chilli jam for an extra kick!
I see dead cows…
Quorn on the Bob
DIFFICULTY
Easy
TIME
40 minutes
INGREDIENTS
400g tinned chickpeas, 2 tbsp olive oil, 2 small carrots, 1 medium onion, 3 cloves of garlic, 300g quorn mince, sea salt and pepper to taste. 1 medium corn on the cob. Pitta breads.
PROCESS
These vegetarian burgers aren’t just super simple they’re also delicious and dare I say it, healthy too! You’re going to need a food processor to help speed this whole process up though so if you haven’t got one then you’re going to have to break into an electronics store and rob one… or borrow one!
Take the quorn out of the freezer and set aside – don’t defrost it in the microwave.
Peel the carrots and chop into chunks and do the same with the onion and garlic. Toss into the blender with the salt and pepper then pulse blend them. Drain the can of chickpeas but keep a little of the liquid aside (about 3 tbsp) for extra flavour (this is entirely optional) and then add the chickpeas to the processor with a tbsp of olive oil and blitz the ingredients together until fully combined – at this point you can add as much of the leftover liquid you kept as you like. Once full combined combine the mix with the quorn mince and stir together.
If the mix is too wet add some flour, if it’s too dry add a little more olive oil. Shape the burger mix into patties and set in the fridge for twenty minutes.
In a saucepan bring some water to boil and add the corn.
Heat a frying pan with the other tablespoon of olive oil and when it begins to smoke, it’s hot enough to add the patties and let them cook on one side for 2 minutes. Flip the burger patties, be gentle, you’ll notice they’re very soft and can break apart (thankfully they can be mashed back together). Cook for another a further two minutes or until golden brown.
Toast the pitta breads until they’re nice and crispy then dress with the burger, some side salad and mayonnaise. Remove the corn from the saucepan and add to the plate, crack a little salt and black pepper over it and add a teaspoon of butter to taste.
Editor-in-Chief, part-time super villain and hoarder of cats. If you can’t find me writing, I’m probably in the kitchen!
