There is one thing my parents have never understood about my generation is our fascination with games and sitting for hours *cough* days playing them. In fairness to them my parents have partly funded and put up with my gaming nature (fan girling all over Kingdom Hearts television adverts included). It becomes tiring talking at them about not being able to pass a level or a boss though as their eyes just glass over and I can tell, they have stopped listening.
Typically anime would be my main thing but somehow my mother “understands” that, she does watch soap operas religiously after all so I decided to show her some images from popular games and see if she could guess what they are about. Warning I may bleep out some things she says, ah Mammy I will live to regret this.
Skyrim
This is a planet of simple dinosaurs who don’t know what they do or even that their dinosaurs, you the player take part in a group who are sent to this planet to educate these dinosaurs on how to be man eating fire throwing dinosaurs. You have to be careful though because some go renegade and you have to make plans to calm and control them. Controlling them means becoming a part of a legion who train these dinosaurs for the armed forces that use them and their power to invade other worlds. (I have to wonder does she realise that’s a dragon and not a dinosaur.)
Bioshock Infinite
She is stuck in the ruins of a castle and there is an earthquake/hurricane. She is trapped in the ruins and may die. This woman goes from world to world trying stop the calamities, she needs some ones help to find an item hidden within the depths of the castle. This item will help stop the earthquake/hurricanes from destroying more worlds. If she doesn’t succeed then the people of these worlds become hogs (Even though their world is destroyed Mam?) there will be but hog life!
Animal Crossing
This is the game the euthanasia group send when you get in contact with them to help your decision to be euthanized. The game has more of these little f****** twerps who just annoyingly come on giving you compliments and they start making rugs and other household appliances. They continue their little mundane lives icing fairy cakes and having birthday parties with ice cream and jelly. The game is too that you have to draw the patterns of the rugs, make the icing figures for the fairy cakes, slowly showing you how mundane your life is. It’s no surprise no one finishes this game…
Final Fantasy XV
It’s like a father ted lovely boy festival and they have to parade themselves around before being auctioned off, promises of erotic behaviours and deeds are the main focus of the start of the game, who can promise the most excitement for the bidder’s money. The game is you providing the services promised if your lovely boy is bid on the most but here the thing if you can’t complete the deeds in the allotted time with camera’s watching your every move then you are shipped off to the galaxy of ugly teddy bears. Oh and your apart of the gay boy band – The Johnnys.
